Wasn't going to mention this. But in for a penny, in for a pound hey.! So, I'm riding through the Kalahari Desert, with limited supplies and petrol. Every chance I have to buy petrol, I do. To keep my 300 km max. range constantly available. You can go hours without getting to even a small community.
Well, I thought Calvinia was a one horse town. Brandvlei is still dreaming of that one horse!! It's basically a cross road in the middle of the desert, half a dozen houses and a petrol station. Litterally. Now my bike has had a problem with pressure building up in the fuel tank. As soon as you fill the Chonda up, the heat and fumes combine and out the petrol oozes from the filler cap. It's not a look, with a bare engine just below. To counter this, I fill up, keep the cap off and go and grab a drink. Then once ive got my kit all on, I get my new anti petrol, sponge cloth at the ready. Set off, right hand on the throttle, left hand mopping the petrol from the filler cap. You get the picture.
I parked the bike outside the petrol station come restaurant and had a bite to eat. Got my helmet and gloves on. And began the whole ride your bike one handed, whilst 2 litres of unleaded bellows out all over the gaff. Riding and mopping at the same time, the petrol stopped flowing out. (Nice one). But I was left with this petrol soaked sponge cloth. Unsure at 100 kmph, what to do with it, I popped it between my legs and sort of sat on it. (You know where this is going.)
Well.......welll...........if you think Towering Inferno meets Ralgex ......you have no idea of A) my surprise, and B) The paaaaain!!!!!!!!!
I'm not kidding. The petrol covered cloth had seeped through my Enduro Suit, right into my......er.........Man Garden!!! It was like a nuclear reactor had ruptured or something. It was on fire down there. All I wanted to do was instantly stop and get my 3 litre water bladder out and get the pipe out and dowse the Garden down. Man the pain. Walking on coals, has nothing on petrol in the the Man Garden. Not content with the fire from hell down stairs. My nose and right eye were itching a bit. ( Take a guess what clever clogs did next ?) " Yep", I wiped my eye and nose. ........with my now, petrol covered glove. Result !!! My right eye was on fire, my nose was on fire and stank of petrol and my Man Garden was going through some sort of scorched earth policy. Then to top the lot, my black PVC seat, that had been sat in the Kalahari Desert sun whilst I ate. Was like hot enough to fry an egg on. !! Everywhere was just on fire. And the noises that were coming out of my crash helmet were nothing other than that of a mad man.
So, that was my day. What did you do ?? Funny. Sort of. So, Will's top tip.......keep petrol and Man Gardens apart. A long way apart.
No photos were taken during Man Garden Gate. And any attempt to discuss Man Garden Gate will be ignored😂😂
PS I have showered for an extended period. And everything is as it should be. ☺
Please make Man Garden Gate worthwhile by clicking the Help for Heroes logo. The other person wont.....so please take a second to do some good, im doing my bit. The rest is up to you.
PPS. Just saying.........
Will x
