Man Garden Gate !!!!

Wasn't going to mention this. But in for a penny, in for a pound hey.! So, I'm riding through the Kalahari Desert,  with limited supplies and petrol. Every chance I have to buy petrol, I do.  To keep my 300 km max. range constantly available. You can go hours without getting to even a small community.

Well, I thought Calvinia was a one horse town. Brandvlei is still dreaming of that one horse!! It's basically a cross road in the middle of the desert, half a dozen houses and a petrol station. Litterally. Now my bike has had a problem with pressure building up in the fuel tank. As soon as you fill the Chonda up, the heat and fumes combine and out the petrol oozes from the filler cap. It's not a look, with a bare engine just below.  To counter this, I fill up, keep the cap off and go and grab a drink. Then once ive got my kit all on, I get my new anti petrol, sponge cloth at the ready. Set off, right hand on the throttle,  left hand mopping the petrol from the filler cap. You get the picture.

I parked the bike outside the petrol station come restaurant and had a bite to eat. Got my helmet and gloves on. And began the whole ride your bike one handed, whilst 2 litres of unleaded bellows out all over the gaff. Riding and mopping at the same time, the petrol stopped flowing out. (Nice one). But I was left with this petrol soaked sponge cloth. Unsure at 100 kmph, what to do with it, I popped it between my legs and sort of sat on it. (You know where this is going.)

Well.......welll...........if you think Towering Inferno meets Ralgex ......you have no idea of A) my surprise,  and B) The paaaaain!!!!!!!!!

I'm not kidding. The petrol covered cloth had seeped through my Enduro Suit, right into my......er.........Man Garden!!! It was like a nuclear reactor had ruptured or something. It was on fire down there. All I wanted to do was instantly stop and get my 3 litre water bladder out and get the pipe out and dowse the Garden down. Man the pain. Walking on coals, has nothing on petrol in the the Man Garden. Not content with the fire from hell down stairs. My nose and right eye were itching a bit. ( Take a guess what clever clogs did next ?) " Yep", I wiped my eye and nose. ........with my now, petrol covered glove. Result !!! My right eye was on fire, my nose was on fire and stank of petrol and my Man Garden was going through some sort of scorched earth policy. Then to top the lot, my black PVC seat, that had been sat in the Kalahari Desert sun whilst I ate. Was like hot enough to fry an egg on. !! Everywhere was just on fire. And the noises that were coming out of my crash helmet were nothing other than that of a mad man.

So, that was my day. What did you do ?? Funny. Sort of. So, Will's top tip.......keep petrol and Man Gardens apart. A long way apart.

No photos were taken during Man Garden Gate. And any attempt to discuss Man Garden Gate will be ignored😂😂

PS I have showered for an extended period.  And everything is as it should be. ☺

Please make Man Garden Gate worthwhile by clicking the Help for Heroes logo. The other person wont.....so please take a second to do some good, im doing my bit. The rest is up to you.

PPS. Just saying.........

Will x

Nigeria. A land of contrast.

Nigeria I'm told, is the 8th wealthiest country on the planet.You will need to check that. I am not the Discovery Channel. Yet,I guess, in my own way, I am. Of a fashion :)

Abuja is only twenty odd years old. Purpose built to be Nigerias new capital. It's new found wealth,born of huge oil reserves. A capital city to reflect and represent that.

The roads are good, the water is always available, as is electricity. When it does fail,lots of diesel generators kick in. All privately owned by the given business. There are western type food chains. Small, but modern shopping centres, bars and all you'd expect say in Europe. Most are high end. The prices being at the least, the same as Europe. At the least. Bottle of beer...? Upto £5 !! Small Pizza and Fanta ?? £10 .All are crawling with security. Scanners and metal detectors at the entrances. And the Army and Police are never far away. :)

Outside of the bad. Which I'm coming to. Almost all the Nigerians have been very respectful. Very. Always calling me ' Sir ' or even ' Master '. Upon arriving anywhere, I receive,  ' Sir you are welcome '. All the time. Did you expect that ? I didn't.

Nigeria, on that front, it has been a absolute pleasure. I hope to return to Abuja. They always like a white man to front a business. It gives them more credibility. So you never know. I'm interested.

But it's definitely not all roses and cottages. That's for sure. Illegal road blocks !!! Huge tree trunks in the road. Planks of wood with six inch nails in them. Men sometimes armed with rifles and machetes. Looking to get money. But you don't see white men. Ever!! They are in Abuja or Calabar. So when I turn up, they shout at me. Annoyed I've slipped through their road block. I do it by waiting for a truck,van or finally,a car. And fly through at the last second, on the blind side.

A blog is a quick snap shot. I can't share everything. But Nigeria is certainly not all bad. I've liked the mentality I've met and the majority of the people.

Road Signs. Imagine trying to drive around your own country without any road signs ! There are non here...zero. ..narda...non. 600 km in two days. And a mixture of the best roads in Africa. And the absolute worst. No GPS, no map and no bloody road signs. Imagine that! !!! Make it easy for me Nigeria. ..Cheers !!

Long story short. Between yesterday and today, I've covered around 600 km. Not much ?? Well today I went totally off the grid. Really for the crack. There was a proper road. But I just wanted to cut across country. And off my home made map. Just going on less than a dust road. Much less. Close to just guessing really. Following my nose. Through bush villages and jungle. Thick jungle now. Everyone just gob smacked. But for some reason the illegal road block men, cheered me. Three separate road blocks. I salute them and they salute back. No idea what it's all about. But it's worked so far. :) Fingers.

Until, I came across a dried river. Completely in the middle of nowhere. No idea even now. All dirt dust and rock. And as I entered the river, half a dozen men jumped up. They were all digging. No idea again. All were shouting and un be known to me, they had a Bamboo blockade.  But...here's the but. They ran to lift it. And were prepared to help push my bike,up the dried river bank.

As non were armed and I was. I actually stopped. Not a great move maybe. But we spoke, middle of the jungle and their English was good. And that's rare in Nigeria. I explained my story. They seemed to like it a lot. Asked for a gift. I said I had my own money problems. ( I'm at £500 and it's going fast.) But gave 50 Naira. About 20 p. We all shook hands, which is done over hand and a mutual finger click. And I continued along the tiny dirt track. ( Lucky. )

After several hours I hit tarmac. No idea where I was. But logic said I was going in the right direction. Not one minute later, my chain came off my bike. Stretched loads by the past 100++ km of off roading. It was hanging.

A lad pointed me to a hut which fixed the usual Chinese bikes. I was instantly surrounded by a good dozen men. The atmosphere was mild aggression towards me. I kept my cool and was polite. But didn't show the worry I had inside. The eldest and largest began to grill me. Quickly telling me. ... " your people colonised us ". He wasn't a happy bunny.  ( My knife strapped to the inside of my left arm. )  I said I was old, but not that old and wasn't there. And asked how he was. He said..." ahhh but you received some of the benefits. .."!!

I did consider mentioning my country had also been colonised, by the Romans ( Italians), the Normans, ( the French ), the Vikings, ( the Danish).....and of course three Germanic tribes. The Angles, the Saxon and little known Judd. ( Poor Judd never get a mention. ) But the moment didn't seem too right for a history lesson.  And just said "...well its getting poorer now....if that helps "  To  which he said " good ". And offered me water.

Bike wise. O have a guess....I broke the frame! !! Luggage rack that is. A number of bolts rattled free too. And the rear suspension bottoms out a lot. I actually don't think the shocker has gone again. Just that with the weight of all my kit and the limited travel, the tyre sometimes hits the fender. Photos below.

Bit of a long one today. I'm in a town called Aplapum. A bush town. No roads or banks or anything. The very basic Guesthouse costing 2,000 N.Electicity after 7pm. Stand in a bucket and throw water on yourself, for your ' shower ' ! ive eaten chicken and rice. With pepper sauce. And enjoyed it. Very spicy.No white men in these parts. That's for sure. Meal was 500 N. Restaurant owner very pleased I complemented the food so much. They expert white men to be eating something else.

Lots happens I can't put in this blog.
Photos of the village bush track. Good 100 km worth. Will check exact distance. I think further. Women washing clothes and child in the river. My bathroom and shower buckets. And me dripping with swet and really cool helmet hair. ( dont be rude.) Writing this and going to sleep. Will upload in Calabar. Via wifi, when I find it . Phone has gone all bold on me. :)

But I am doing all of this for wounded servicemen. Men and women without arms. Without legs ! Can you begin to imagine ? Sat in wheel chairs. Abandonded by the polititions who sent them to war. " NO MONEY FOR YOU "!! all whilst they write a cheque for £12,000,000,000... in so called ' aid '!!!  Get your priorities right.!!!! Stop giving money to India and China. Who both have space programmes. British tax payers money should be spent on the British. .....

....or is it correct that we leave our servicemen in with no legs,no dignity,in wheel chairs ??

Help me to help them. X

Please click the HELP FOR HEROES LOGO AND SHOW YOUR SUPPORT. please make my efforts worthwhile.

Calabar tomorrow and get the Cameroon Visa. Should be in Cameroon in 48 hrs.

Please make a donation. Click the Help for Heroes logo.

Thank you.

Will x

Abuja

Ok. Just a quick one. As I've written this once already. But won't upload.

Angola is not issuing visas. The end. And that's why I'm here in abuja. So.....I'm going to have to ship around the country. No idea how. But that's what I have to do. Will let you know,  just as soon as I know :))

Abuja is pretty nice. No more bush meat. No more illegal road blocks. No more civilians with guns. ( That I can see anyway. )

When I was in the last town,getting my bike fixed. A crowd of one hundred people arrived. Kids from the school. It was crazy. It was bloody embarrassing! ! Head Master came out with the cane,to get his pupils back. Lol.

A grand " bonjour et merci " to Jean Luc and the Corsican bush. :))

Captains Log: I've been in Abuja for three days now. I'm staying at the Sheraton !!! Well, actually, I am camping in my tent, at the rear of the Sheraton ! For Overlanders out there, there has been a change in pricing.

Previously it was 500 N a day and a three day minimum stay. That changed last week. It is now 5000 N a day and five days minimum stay. So not cheap. The staff here are 5 star. But the building is 2 star in places. Worn and run down. And along with all of Abuja, is only twenty years old. The camping is around the back. You can use the hot shower in the squash courts. The pool. And wifi, from the Business Center is 2000 N per 24 hrs. Security is tight,  as is all of Abuja. There must be twenty security guards around and in the building. Armed soldiers on the main entrance at the front and rear.

Abuja it's self is nice. There is definatley money here. Born of the oil industry. But that wealth is held by the very few.Enjoyed being here and getting some of lifes luxuries. A hot shower. Actually, a shower, not stood in a bucket, has been nice. Pizza, yes Pizza. Very expensive. Can't afford it, 2000 N for a small one. Fast Food chain Mr  Biggs, does chicken and rice for 1000N. And is what I've been living off since arriving in Abuha. Green taxi's are everywhere, as are private motorists. All tooting their horns. Negotiate your price, when white, they will over charge you. When they say 500 N, the real price will be 300 N. If he insists, walk away and just put your hand out again. Another car will stop in a few seconds. 

Here are some photos.

Benin

Yes, it's a country ! After the visa athon, I am pleased to be here. I left Guilliam in Lome at 12am.And my 'French connection' contacts. Ive really enjoyed meeting these French guys. And they helped me a lot with the language. Which I value. A great bunch of characters,  who I plan to meet again. Anyway, i finally found the guesthouse I was looking for at 6 pm. Here in Contonou.

Sat outside on the veranda, as I'm sort of room less at the moment. The route here was very plush, with lots of new things to look at. Tiny islands with houses on. Fishermen in the lagoon, walking in the water with their nets. And the usual multitude of pots, pans,mops, food and aircraft parts, being carried on the women's heads.

I've been doing my research today. With a view to getting my Angola Visa tomorrow. The criteria is lengthy and not easy to fulfil. A ' Letter of Invitation ' is required. From an Angolan, resident in the country. 3 months bank statements and $100. ( The Embassy should be impressed with income these past months......zero.! )

Ahead of me is 300 km of heading inland. And crossing into Nigeria via Nikki. It's lesa dangerous than Lagos. But between Nikki and Abuja, there are 100 Check Points. Half of which are Vigilante.

So when I see just £100 in the past three weeks donated. It deflates me. All this cost,planning and personal risk. It truly gets to me. I mean what do have to do to make this a success ??

Can you help?  Can you email the national papers and bike magazines. Numbers count. This challenge has hit Facebook saturation point. Donation wise.

I said I will only stop if I run out of money or worse. I'm at £1,100 and got fifty vigilante check points ahead in Nigeria .

Please help me to help wounded servicemen. Click the Help for Heroes logo. And email the papers.

Will

.....the changing face of Africa.

Quick one. Please remember, my blog is but a snap shot of what happens. So, so much goes on. Good and bad. I just can never fit it all in. :)))

So onto the capital of Burkina Faso,  after meeting more extortion, at two of Ghana's border posts. I wanted to try to A) try and get some visa's.  And B ) the road from Leo to the Togo border, was close to non existant. My luggage rack, yet again had taken a pounding. The new bolt that attached it to the bike frame, now bent. And the overly large 'style', exhaust, hitting the rear tyre,  whilst going off road.

I had a BBC Nottingham phone interview at 3 pm. And needed to be near a cell tower. I don't ever use my phone,  as a phone. Just camera and i pod and wifi.

Having had two nights in  cheap accommodation. In Pa and Leo. That prisoners wouldn't be allowed to stay in. Decades of filth, flees, mosquitos and even a rat. I fancied somewhere hygienic, but reasonable.

I did the interview, seemed to go ok. Problem was, I had ordered a western meal. My first in weeks. And for comedy value,  it finally arrived, as the BBC rang me.

So to say I spoke quickly, is an under statement. I've only tasted beef once, in three months. And there was my rather expensive pepper steak going cold. :((  Ce la ve.

Checked out the DRC embassy. They wanted 104,000 cfa for a Transit Visa !! Plus bribes and Lasser Passer at the border. "No chance", I'm not paying that. Will try another DRC embassy. Remember,  nothing is standardised in Africa.

I drew my map of my route,  to the Togo border. A distance of about 290 km. ( using wifi ). And off I went to the home of Voodoo! ! Yea...exciting or what ? ( Do they do a doll of Suzuki GB ) ? I doubt if Togo has enough pins !!!

I saw the now usual tribal villages, the surprised faces of the locals. On their bicycles, women with pots and pans on their heads. The children happily playing,yet without toys. Just the odd lucky one having a old tyre and rolling it with a stick.

It was just great to be back on the bike. Really enjoyed it. But due to the admin behind this challenge. I'd not left till lunch time. And day light.was running out. Reluctantly, I found a spot to wild camp. I knew local tribe huts were close. Too close. I have a 1 km away rule, for security. But had to break it, as they were just everywhere.

Camp was made by 7 pm, hidden behind some rocks. And by 8 pm I could hear traditional African dance and tribal singing !! It sounded great. The tribes and their culture are changing. Nothing came of it. Bar my realisation, that I maybe on the same planet. But I'm in a different world.

Africa is changing around me. Gone is the desert. Im entering tropical Africa. Very green and with lots of animals. Time to pay attention. And work with my surroundings.

Uneventful day. Just pleased to be underway again. After bike delays in Mali and then malaria delays.

Some photos of Martyrs Monument. My Will Will gps map. A van with live goats on board. That sounded like children crying. My tent being patched up. Lots of holes for bugs and ants with attutude problems to get in. : ) And bits I saw on route to Togo. Camped 64 km from the frontier.

Next stop. ....voodoo! !!

This road is long and it's definitely red !!!

Wifi is so rare it's barely warm. :)

Complete with the usual high quality map, I left Bobo and headed to the Ghana border. Ghana is not on my absolute direct route. But, the capital Accra, is a good place to get visa's. The infamous Angolan ' Willy Wonka Golden Ticket ' of the visa world, possibly being obtained there.

Some of these countries I'm going to and through, are the most beurocratic,  corrupt and difficult to get into.

Still wearing essence de la Malaria, I made my way to Pa. Stomach still dodgy and ears still slightly deaf.

Between Bobo Dioulasso and Ougadougou. ( pronounced. .waga doo goo.) I came across a sign. ' Air de parking '. ( Anyone who has been to France,  will be familiar with this. )

Now remember that Burkina Faso is a very,  very poor country. It survives only due to aid. Outside of the two main cities, you will find the population getting around via flip flops and old bicycles.

So what do you reckon I came across 160 km away from any town.  In the middle of absolutely nowhere ???

A massive car park !!!! You could land a plan on it ! Air de parking. Same as you would have off a busy motorway in France. That's,  ' busy ' motorway !! I'd read about this place before. And there it was. In all it's illogical and costly glory. Because as your people starve, thats what you'd do!! Aid at it's finest. Made a video. Will upload on Facebook page, London to Johannesburg. Click " like " and you'll get the updates. 

I finally found Pa and stayed at possibly the worst aubergine in Africa. Still feeling bad,with the left overs of malaria. I thought it better to be near people, instead of wild camping. As a ' just incase '. The room looked like it had been deficated in. And smeared on the walls. The bed was broken and flees were hoping out of the pillow. I now have an infected eye, as a result. O joy.  ( made a video and will stick it on fb page. London to Johannesburg. )

The shower was the usual hole in the floor and bucket of water. Which a lady fetched in a large silver bowl from the well. Returning with it balanced on her head. The toilet also the usual hole in the ground, flys everywhere. And a plastic kettle by it's side, with water in it. A hum....you can work it out.

I couldn't find anything to eat. Which is an ongoing problem for me. So fried one of my valued Corned Beef tins.

The locals were surprised and respectful.  Saying "bon soir', putting their right hand out. Whilst holding the forearm with the left. ' presenting ' the hand.

The French  language barrier, both frustrates and isolates me. Food and solitude, are my personal challenges in all this. The rest is within range.

The owner of the auberge did ask me a question though. Part English and part French. ....are you ready.?
Said totally seriously. ..." can you come back and take my son to L'anglataire ". Wow !! Bob smacked. Even calling his wife, who had said son, strapped to her back with a sheet. He was about two years old. I explained " impossibla...visa ". Goes to show you the desperation. And lack of understanding of the outside world.

Single with a black child. Explain that one to society. " well I was on my bike......".

On the Ghana backpacker website, it states you can get a visa at the border for 100Ghana Ceti.about £28.ish. I cleared Burkina Faso Duan and Police. No bribes and only smiles and sqwarky noises,as I explained how far I'd come.

Over to Ghana at Hamile frontier. Short of it ? A Lassier Passer is possible at the border. Despite the official line being you need a Carnet de Passage. Cost about £10. I risked it, as everything on the Internet said it was impossible. Back to ' anything can happen in Africa. ' ...and probably will.

Over to Ghana Immigration. £28 for a visa ??? No . Try $200 to be paid in US $$$. And yes,exchanged at their rate. Why would you have US $$ for Ghana ??? So I simply said " goodbye ". Mutch to their surprise. And high tailed it back to Burkina Faso.

81 km I was told to Leo. Another border crossing. The road,red with dust. Green vegetation either side. Totally rural,with the odd village. Round huts, straw roofs. Wildebeest , chickens and donkey's.

Quick one. I love the off road riding, it's real freedom. The bike luggage frame on the other hand, does not !! So much weigh on the rear,it keeps breaking the welds, as I hit the bumps and troughs. The exhaust now scraping on the tyre. ( which I've subsequently fixed. )

So,knackered and into Leo. A frontier town. Shacks and huts as shops.No street lights. And a uncomfortable feel to it. Through the whole B.F. Police and Customs routine. 18 km of no mans land. And into Ghana.

This time I complained about the visa con. But it was now $150 !!! After an hour of negotiations. I simply said " Ghana has priced it's self out of the market. Togo is 10,00 cfa.(£12). To get a visa.Im going to go there. Get visa's at Lome the capital. Goodbye."

The big Customs boss was shocked. It was now gone 8 pm, pitch black. No street lights for the return journey. ( mainly as there's no street.) It's all off road....humm in the pitch dark. No chance of coming off of course :))))

Into auberge number 2 in 24 hrs. Into another disgusting room. Where as I entered, a rat was leaving. ....

Will do a blog tomorrow. .